Assertiveness

How to make your point, with confidence

When people are assertive they portray a strong, confident image and can put their views across while still taking other people’s opinions into account.

Non-assertive, passive aggressive or aggressive behaviour can cause misunderstandings, frustration and even a breakdown in relationships at work.

In this highly practical session participants discover how effective body language, voice, and the words they say make a big difference to the results they get. Importantly, they learn how to build confidence that leads to assertive behaviour more of the time. And how to disagree without being disagreeable!

What’s in it for you?

  • Recognise the differences between assertive, aggressive and passive behaviour
  • Overcome the barriers to assertive behaviour
  • Understand the impact your non-verbal communication has on people
  • Make assertive requests – and follow up effectively
  • Say ‘no’, where appropriate
  • Be more assertive in meetings
  • Give negative feedback – without giving offence

Workshop outline

(Full-day version, 9.30 – 5.00)

1 Why be assertive?

2 Assertiveness defined

  • What is assertiveness?
  • Why does it matter?
  • The assertiveness spectrum
    • Passive
    • Assertive
    • Aggressive
  • Skills practice: demonstrating the spectrum

3 Channels of assertiveness

  • The three channels of assertiveness
    • What we show
    • What we say
    • How we sound
  • The ‘I’m OK / you’re OK’ model
    • Avoiding non-assertive behaviour as a default position
  • Skills practice: confidently stating your opinion

4 Assertive language

  • The importance of direct communication
  • The problems with indirect communication
  • Skills practice: standing your ground
  • ‘Wimp talk’ v ‘power talk’
    • ‘Wimp talk’ quiz
  • Voice
  • Body language
  • Skills practice: making assertive requests

5 Refusing requests and saying ‘no’

  • The hardest word
  • When to use it…
  • … and how

6 Assertive follow-up

  • Empathic assertion
  • The broken record technique
  • Keeping body language consistent with verbal
  • Skills practice: making assertive requests
  • Self-disclosure and empathy
  • Escalating requests

7 How to disagree without being disagreeable

  • The 3As model
    • Acknowledge
    • Agree
    • And (not ‘but’)
  • Skills practice: disagreeing in an assertive way

8 How to be assertive in different situations

  • How to raise an issue
    • How to be proactive and assertive with your manager
    • Barriers
    • Skills practice: suggesting a change
  • How to give negative feedback
    • Have the right mindset
    • Have a framework
    • Skills practice: giving feedback to a colleague
  • How to be assertive in a meeting
    • Why do it
    • How to do it
    • Skills practice: group exercise

9 Actions and next steps

  • Review
  • Personal action planning
  • Next steps

To discuss which management and personal effectiveness modules would best suit you, just give us a call on 01582 714280 and we’ll be happy to talk you through the options.